My Tattoo Pet Peeves (and questions answered)
Sun, Apr 1st, 2007
I have tattoos. Some would say that I have a lot of tattoos, but that’s entirely a matter of perspective. Regardless of my tattoo coverage, for your education, entertainment, and/or curiosity, I present the most common questions and comments I hear, with my reactions. Enjoy?
“What do your tattoos mean?”
I blame TLC’s tattoo reality show Miami Ink for this question. Though I do watch and even enjoy Miami Inkon occasion, the show has some problems. Chief among them is the notion that anyone who gets a tattoo is overcoming terminal illnesses, the death of loved ones, or other major life hurdles. These are valid reasons for getting tattoos, but they’re not the only reasons people get work done. What people find the hardest to believe about my tattoo work is that I get it because I like it — and that’s about it. I haven’t overcome cancer nor am I marking the passing of a dear friend. I just like the art of it, great tattoo art looks amazing, and I sort of like pain. And, speaking of pain….
“does it hurt?”
This one isn’t a huge bother, but people ask it all the time, so I feel obliged to discuss it. To start, let’s get this out of the way: yes, tattooing hurts. How badly does it hurt? Well, a lot of that depends on your personal constitution and where you’re getting work done. I personally find the “ditch” (the inside of the elbow) uncomfortable and the back of the elbow really fucking horrendous. In terms of pain, tattooing is mostly tolerable and mostly short bursts of discomfort. Your body manufactures some wonderful endorphins that give you an almost euphoric feeling, and so the pain decreases significantly after 15 minutes or so. I think outlining hurts worse than shading/coloring, but others disagree. Some people assume the pain is like getting a needle at the doctor’s office; it is nothing like this. If anything, it is more of a ripping or buzzing feeling, kind of electric. In terms of putting up with the pain, most people are capable of putting up with at least a few hours of tattooing. My longest session was 10 hours, and I don’t think I have a particularly remarkable ability to suffer pain.
stupid stereotypes
A few years ago, the child of a couple whose acquaintance we made came up to me and said “YOU HAVE TATTOOS! ONLY BURGLARS HAVE TATTOOS!”, stomped on my foot, and ran off, calling me “Mr. Stupidhead” as he sprinted away (by the way, kid, that’s Doctor Stupidhead, thanks). Of course, I don’t blame his parents for this — he could have heard this anywhere — but there are still some stupid-ass stereotypes floating around out there about tattooed people: we’re criminals, we’re low-life, etc. etc. etc. Yes, some people do get fantastically bad work for fantastically bad reasons, and yes, tattoos are still popular in prisons, in motorcycle gangs, and in other subcultures generally. But for the last decade or more, this has been changing, as is well-documented by Dave Kimmel in the excellent INKED Inc., which documents the “intersection of body art and professional culture.” (By the way, I’m going to be photographed for this project in April). In short, liking body art does not mean that you’re all into kiestering dope into the pen for your gangster friends; it just means that you like body art. Beyond that, generalizations fail.
The word “tats.”
I just hate this word. It makes me think of drunk girls getting bad tattoos above their asscracks that say “aim here” in Kanji or whatever. Dudes who drive 1984 IROC Zs are apt to say something like “Bitchin’ tats, dude,” but without the requisite irony befitting the situation. Please don’t say “tats” or its even uglier cousin “tatted.” It just makes you look cheap.
“are they real?”
People do seriously ask. Yes, they’re real. No, they’re not really good looking transfers, nylon sleeves, or henna. They’re tattoos, and they’re in my skin. Forever.
“but you’ll have those when you’re old!”
Yes, I will. Life is fleeting; better to make decisions that you enjoy now than to regret that you didn’t make them later. I’m old enough now that I know what I’m doing, why I’m doing it, and why I won’t regret it in 30 or 40 or 50 years.
“you know they’re permanent, riiiiight?”
Really? I had no idea! The guy at the bitchin’ tat shop told me they’d come off in a week. (sigh)
uninvited touching of tattoos, body, or clothing.
On both of my arms, I have coverage that starts at my wrists and goes up to my shoulders. Every so often, someone will follow the design up my arm, and then pull up my shirt sleeve to continue following the design. What the fuck is this about? Since when did having a tattoo invite you to peel back layers of my clothing? Yes, you can look at them, and if you’re interested and ask nicely, I’ll show you, but I don’t understand what it is about having tattoos that automatically signals to people “hey, I can remove this guy’s clothing for a better look!” If I can’t remove your clothing without your permission to get a better look at the features of your body I find intriguing or attractive, then you can’t remove mine for the same reason. Sound fair?
Ignorant comments about me as if I don’t exist or am deaf.
Last summer, I was home for a family function, and a friend of the family came up to me and my mom, completely ignoring that I even existed, and said to my mom — with me standing there! — “Wow, I had no idea he was so tatted up and all.” Um, what the fuck? Do I not exist? Prior to this time, it’d probably been over 30 years since I’d been spoken about in this manner; I truly felt like a child again, but not in a good way.
That’s about it for the time being….I’m sure I’ll come up with more, and I’ll post them as I think of them.
(P.S. To be clear, in all honesty, I don’t mind questions or comments about my tattoos if they’re thoughtful….but I could really do without the stupid comments that seem to outnumber the thoughtful comments or queries at least 2 to 1.)
# Comment by Ryan on Mon, Apr 2nd, 2007 at 11:17 am:
So here’s my stupid-question-that-I’ve-always-wondered: where does it hurt *least* to get a tattoo?
# Comment by Bob Torres on Mon, Apr 2nd, 2007 at 12:45 pm:
Well, considering that I don’t have a ton of coverage outside of my arms, I can’t say much about the rest of the body, but I think it is pretty safe to say that your upper arm (on the outside of your arm) is pretty easy.
It _all_ hurts, though….are you thinking about getting some work done, Ryan?
# Comment by Ryan on Mon, Apr 2nd, 2007 at 5:59 pm:
I figured it all hurts — was just curious if any areas were noticably less sensitive than others.
I was going to make some smart comment about getting a picture of your face tattooed somewhere inappropriate, but I have more respect for your web site than that.
# Comment by Bob Torres on Mon, Apr 2nd, 2007 at 6:15 pm:
inappropriate comments are welcomed and encouraged. You should know me better than that by now.
# Comment by Deb on Tue, Apr 3rd, 2007 at 8:12 pm:
I like the new look!
My question is - is it polite to stare? (ignoring that it isn’t impolite to stare in all countries/cultures!)
Saw this article on nytimes, thought it was interesting, given the LI attempt at a ban. http://empirezone.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/04/03/a-triple-piercing-with-that-frappuccino/
# Comment by Bob Torres on Fri, Apr 6th, 2007 at 10:12 am:
hey debmango! sorry for the slow response — you got caught as spam, not sure why. Sorry about that.
Anyway, as for staring…I don’t know. It is kinda weird, isn’t it?
What do you think?
The article is interesting, too: given those rules, I’d be unable to work at Starbuck’s, which happens to be fortunate, because I’d never _want_ to work there ;). Union busting is evil shit.
# Comment by sarah on Sat, Apr 7th, 2007 at 12:11 pm:
Come and work at my shop for a week… we get all that AND MORE!!
My favourite is when American Tourists complain about getting Canadian money back when they pay for their tattoo… Um… YOU’RE IN ANOTHER COUNTRY!!
# Comment by Bob Torres on Sat, Apr 7th, 2007 at 8:23 pm:
heh, Americans are STOOPID. Plus, like, Canada has McDonalds and shit, and everybody speaks American, so why don’t you use American money, you backwards people?
Seriously, though, I can imagine how much pain you have to suffer through. I pity you.
# Comment by Lorri on Sun, Apr 8th, 2007 at 1:37 pm:
Hi Bob, I am really enjoying this blog along with the VeganFreak site. Have listened to a few of the shows thus far and will definately be listening to more. I found you from a link from Dreena Burtons site. Great work!
Now the tattoo subject. I thoroughly agree with all thats been said so far. But my pet peeve is when people tell me that I don’t look like the “type” that would have them. I know I am “middle aged”, but does the love of bodyart end at a certain age? Or is it that I work in a technical capacity, not at a Mcjob. In this day and age you think the old stereotypes of what a person who loves body art looks like would have died by now.
As far as the looking/staring at others art. Thats a hard one. I know from experience that if I see someones tattoo and try to look a bit harder to see what it is , it can be taken in a lot of different ways, depending on the age or sex of the person.
# Comment by Bob Torres on Sun, Apr 8th, 2007 at 10:11 pm:
Hi Lorri,
Thanks for the nice words. Glad you’ll continue listening to the show and such.
One would think that by now, the stereotypes would have died down, but I’m always surprised to find them alive and kicking in the most depressing places. I suppose it is no different about body art too. Well, screw ‘em! Get what you love, and let them say what they will.
As for looking, certainly a pleasant look is fine, or even a polite query. But if people start touching and removing clothing — uninvited! — then they deserve a smack.
Thanks for the comments, all. Awesome!
# Comment by Deb on Mon, Apr 9th, 2007 at 3:21 pm:
Heh, were you saying staring is weird, or tattoos? I actually think that being conditioned to think that staring is rude is sort of weird. Why not look at what’s around us?
I don’t think tattoos are weird. They are interesting, though, and often too detailed to be taken in on a quick glance. But I suppose what I’m getting at is that just because you put art on your body doesn’t necessarily make it public, right? So my staring out of interest or fascination or whatever reason…well, I don’t know, it is your body. Do I necessarily have the right to stare just because you’ve put art on your body? Though I can’t seem to put my thoughts into words very well, it seems a bit like the pregnant women who experience people suddenly treating her stomach as public property, thinking it is okay to touch her pregnant stomach, when they’d never think it was okay to do to someone who wasn’t pregnant.
Hopefully you can figure out my question in the jumble of thoughts because I can’t seem to ask it clearly!
# Comment by Brooke on Tue, Apr 10th, 2007 at 12:01 am:
Hi Bob,
I really have enjoyed reading your blog.
What I find interesting about my tattoo is how people react to it. As you may or may not know, I spend alot of time at the yoga studio where people don’t have to pull back my clothes to see my tattoo, it is always completely visible. Some people can’t help but stare & NEVER comment, even if you were black & white the day before and now you are all colored in. Other people touch my tattoo every time they see me and say how beautiful it is. My tattoos being ignored doesn’t bother me, nor does it bother me for them to be touched and commented on.
Honestly, I have no idea about proper tattoo etiquette. If I see someone who has a tattoo that I am interested in looking at more closely, I just ask. No one has ever seemed offended that I asked.
Is there a book on proper tattoo manners?
# Comment by Luke on Tue, Apr 10th, 2007 at 9:07 am:
Sorry about the late comment, I finally got around to listening to the latest podcast and hence, the included new blog name-drop.
My questions with regard to tattooing, as somewhat of an aside, revolve around at what age do you think it is wise to get tattoos. That is, a time at which getting them primarily for the single want of liking body art is sufficient and likely will not be regretted at a later date. Obviously this time period is both circumstantial and personal - or, well, I think it probably is - but are there any general guidelines you can provide?
From what I can gather you started and continue to get them at the 30ish mark and I am wondering if it is inherently stupid to get them at or a few years after my current age (17). I have too much appreciation for it to do something recklessly stupid, but what I deem as reckless at this age will almost certainly differ from that which I deem at 30.
On another note, kudos on the blog as I noticed an absence on the VF one and what I have read on this so far is awesome. I have no idea how you manage to find the time to produce a weekly podcast with Jenna and post on this blog among the other things you’re up to. So, cheers for the time and effort (or, co-time and co-effort as it may be) in authoring stuff that both inform and entertain me.
# Comment by Andrew613 on Wed, Aug 22nd, 2007 at 5:19 am:
Old post I know, but whatever, I’m just lurking the internets.
I get the exact same questions as these, and there really are no better answers than the ones you’ve put up here, although you should try being 22 and having full sleeves!
I’m not sure if you’ve had this experience, but for me “tattoo” seems to be another word for “dipshit magnet”. Example; If you happen to be anywhere in public past 10pm, on public transport, or any place where there’s alcohol, you’re likely to attract every possible dickhead that wants to show you their tattoo of Evil Knievel that looks more like Grandpa Simpson, or if you’re lucky, for the next hour you will hear someone tell you all about the tattoos they plan to get.
Either way